


Coward

by milkytheholy1



Category: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Valentine's Day Fluff, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:21:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28578915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkytheholy1/pseuds/milkytheholy1
Summary: Request: f reader is concerned about why Donnie is no longer talking with her about what he's working on, how his day went, etc. he always brushes her off with a blushed face and wants to get back to work. she thinks it's because he's sad or mad or whatever, but it's actually just because Donnie just realized that he has a crush on her and is bashful.14: "I don't want to talk about it." "But you love telling people how brilliant you are. At length."
Relationships: Donatello (TMNT)/Reader, donnie/reader
Kudos: 49
Collections: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles





	Coward

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Okay so I may have changed somethings just because as I was writing it some stuff just kinda fit the story better, so sorry about that. This is kinda way more angsty than it has any right to be and I was debating on leaving it with a kinda unhappy ending but changed it in the end. I also had to change the prompt to fit into the situation better but I did make sure to include it. Hope you enjoy!

Dialling his number for the sixteenth time, you placed your phone to your ear waiting for the ringing to end and for his voice to answer you. The ringing had finally stopped, with a hopeful gasp, you listened as the line went quiet.

"Hello, you've reached Donatello. I'm currently unable to answer the phone right now, call again later or don't-" 

Your body released an ungodly sound as you listened to the same answering machine message, his voice repeating over and over again in your head. Usually, you wouldn't mind having Donnie's voice repeating in your head, but right now it was driving you crazy. Standing from your hunched position on your bed, you paced around your room "You've reached Donatello, currently unable to answer the phone right now, call again later." you mimicked his voice, mocking him like a child.

Your patients for the soft-shell turtle was slowly running thin, glaring at your phone again, your thumb scoured your contacts. Coming across April's number, you decided it would be a good idea to ask her if she knew what was up with the purple-banded turt. Unlike Donatello, April had picked up the phone after a few rings.

"Hello?"

"Hey April, I was wonder-"

"(Y/N), is that you? Gurl where have you been this past week, I felt like I haven't seen you at all!" You chuckled at her hyperactive response, although she did have a point. Ever since Donnie had been avoiding you, you decided to let him be and give him a little space,  _ maybe he was busy and was just a little stressed _ ; that's the excuse your mind came up with. But after a week of space, you went back down to the lair and into his lab, it seemed he had barely noticed your absence as he continued to brush you off. With a huff you left the lair, tears brimming in your eyes. 

"Yeaaahh, about that," you started, chuckling nervously. You didn't need to see April to know that she was squinting harshly at you, your throat had gone dry when you tried to articulate your thoughts. On the other side of the call, April could hear your heavy sigh, "Does he hate me, Ap?"

"Does who hate you?"

"Donnie! He's been avoiding me for weeks now, every time I call him he just lets it ring. I spent a week away from the lair to give him space April, a week! And he didn't even notice!" You could feel your eyes starting to tear up again, clutching your free hand into a fist, you let out a small whimper "Maybe it would be best if I don't go back there at all."

"WHAT!" You cowered away from your phone, your ears buzzing in pain. "(Y/N) you can't be serious right now, Donnie doesn't hate you! Donnie is just- well he's Donnie, you know?"

"That's what Leo said."

"Look (Y/N), Donnie just focuses so hard on something that he loses focus on the things going on around him. Why don't you go down there and talk to him about it or maybe get one of the guys to go talk to him, I'm sure they wouldn't mind especially if you're so upset about it." The phone was silent on your end, your mind wandering through all the possibilities of you talking to Donnie. God, he'd probably hate you for bothering him so much.

"Oooor I could go talk to him, just ask to hang out then bring you up. See what he says?" April asks, breaking the silence. Releasing a shuddering breath, you agree happy to have a friend like her.

The next day April had gone down to the lair like she usually does, waving at the three brothers sat in the gaming room. They saw the way she was walking with determination to Donnie's lab, knowing better they stayed out of it, not wanting to get an earful from April. Banging on the metal doors, April waltzed into the neon-lit lab. Donnie looked up from his desk, goggles covering his eyes, staring blankly at April.

"And whatever do I owe the pleasure?"

"Donnie," April's voice was void of emotion, her eyes beaming down at him. Donnie shifted in his chair, his shoulders slouching against his neck, head slowly dipping into his shell. With a pointed hand, Donnie meekly peeked out from his shell "Is this about the upgrades I made to your phone without your permission?"

"No, this is about- Wait a minute, you updated my phone without me knowing! Why'd you do that!"

"Oh please, I was helping you if anything," Donnie replied, nonchalantly, his body becoming more relaxed. He crossed his legs, his goggles staring at April inadvertently. Quickly growing frustrated with his ignorance, April lashed out on him "No D, I'm talking about (Y/N)! You know, the girl you've been ignoring for weeks? Although I wouldn't expect you to remember that." Donnie squinted at her, thinking she was taking him for a fool. 

In reality, Donnie knew what he was doing, he knew it was hurting you. But, it was hurting him just as much. As much as he hated to admit it, his bad-boy loner attitude had been broken as of late. He couldn't empty his mind of you, your laugh, your smile, the sweet smell you carried around with you. Everything about you was intoxicating to him and he was scared, Donnie wasn't good with emotions and he knew that, as soon as he felt the twitching of his heartstrings whenever he saw you, he knew he was doomed.

Instead of acting upon these feelings, he chose to hide them and in turn hide himself away from you. Every call you made, every message you'd sent, it broke him to watch the screen of his phone flash with you. He rested his elbow against the cold metal of his desk, his cheek being smushed against his palm "I know April, but what am I meant to do."

He huffed out a sigh, his eyes tracing over the screwdriver on his desk, fingers mindlessly playing with the handle. Licking his lips, he pulled off his goggles gently laying them on the metallic surface. April gasped out in shock, her eyes trailing Donnie's appearance "Oh D, look what you've been doing to yourself." Rubbing at his darkened eyes, Donnie huffed out another breath "She hates me, right?" 

April couldn't lie to him, with a muttered "yes" she watched a small tear fall from Donnie's eye. Wiping it away as though it was nothing, he sniffled a little, sitting up his gaze flicked over to April before darting to the floor. "Well, I guess it makes it easier, knowing she hates me. I guess I no longer need to chase after  _ that _ dream."

"You're just going to give up, just like that?" April asked, astounded. Donnie weakly nodded, going to the other side of the room to find some blueprints he had been saving for a while. April placed her hands on her hips, a pout gracing her features "Coward" she uttered. Donnie turned around, his eyes squinting at her "What did you say?" without missing a beat, April turned her side to him refusing to give him eye contact "I said, coward."

Donnie threw the blueprints he had been holding into the air in a fit of rage, "Well what do you want me to do April! She hates me, end of, it works out for everyone." April walked around to Donnie, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, glancing up at him with a small frown she could finally see the tear marks staining his cheeks "Even for you?" she whispered into the tense air.

Donnie shrugged her off, walking back over to his desk he set to work on his next creation " _ Especially _ for me." he muttered grimly, his back facing her. April frowned at Donnie, going over to his desk she glared at his battle shell, looking down at his phone she saw it illuminate with another missed call from you. "Doesn't look like she hates you that much." April nudged the phone closer to his enclosed form "Just rethink your approach D, you're a smart guy." And then she left. She walked back out of those big, metal doors and left him to stew. Alone.

"Hey Donnie, I know April's gone down to talk to you today...and I know it's about me. You're probably sick of it at this point, sick of me anyway. I just wanted to call to say I'll stop, I'll stop leaving all the messages, I'll stop sending all the texts and I'll stop visiting the lair. I'll leave you alone, just like how you wanted. I'm gonna miss you D," With a hushed breath he faintly heard your hurried cries "I love you, Donatello." The message ended.

Donnie's body physically shook, his hands holding up his head. He was thankful he was already sat down because he knew if he wasn't he would have collapsed on the floor by now, his tears freely falling in the comfort of his lab. He listened to every message you ever sent, he read every text you ever gave him, he would listen to you beg and plead for him to give you the time of day. He heard every single thing. He never ignored you and that's possibly why it hurt so much. Hearing you plead and beg for his forgiveness, but doing nothing about it, pretending he couldn't hear you.

He was wrong. He was so wrong. How could he have ever let it get this far? You were prepared to leave the lair for good, leave him and his brothers for good. Pushing away from his chair, sending it flying around his lab, Donnie bolted out of the lab his phone crushed in his hand. Rushing past his brothers, who all sent him a knowing glance, Donnie prayed his legs wouldn't give out before he got to your apartment.

A strangled yelp left your lips when you saw Donnie laying on the floor of your bedroom, one of his legs still sticking out of the window while his face was pushed against the carpet. With the swiftness he learnt from Splinter, Donnie stood straight his eyes never leaving your own "D-Donnie w-what are you doing-g he-" 

Before you could finish your sentence, Donnie had approached you with the grace of a praying mantis and crushed your lips together. Pulling you up slightly by your arms, you froze against him. Donnie continued to kiss you passionately, putting all his unspoken emotions into the action. Eventually, you settled into his embrace feeling the love he was pouring out to you, pulling away with harboured breaths you gazed up at him, shocked. Delicately stroking your cheek with his thumb, he bowed his head down in shame "I know that I hurt you and trust me when I say it was never my intention. I was trying to protect myself, I've never felt this way about anyone before and it scared me. I thought if I ignored it then maybe it would go away, but I should have known that it only hurt me more."

Pulling his face to be eye-level with you, you calmly smiled at him "I just wished you talked to me about it, I get that you were scared but I thought you hated me, D."

"I could never. I'm sorry, I'm sorry I never said anything. I never want to hurt you like that again." You saw the truth in his eyes, you saw the pain and sadness in the bags that he carried. You were embarrassed at how easily you forgave him, but you couldn't help it. You knew he cared, deep down inside you knew he cared and finally, all the waiting was paying off. Wanting to see that beautiful smile again, your lips quirked up into a smirk  ** "But you love telling people how brilliant you are. At length." **

A light laugh left Donatello's lips, sending you a saucy wink, he leaned in closer taking your lips inbetween his again. He could finally stop ignoring this feeling inside him and in fact embrace it, especially if it was with you.


End file.
